Handfasting Vows

Know now before you go further, that since your lives have crossed in this life you have formed ties between each other. As you seek to enter this state of matrimony you should strive to make real, the ideals which give meaning to both this ceremony and the institution of marriage.

With full awareness, know that within this circle you are not only declaring your intent to be handfasted before your friends and family, but you speak that intent also to your creative higher powers.

The promises made today and the ties that are bound here greatly strengthen your union; they will cross the years and lives of each soul’s growth.

Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?

Yes, we seek to enter.

In times past it was believed that the human soul shared characteristics with all things divine. It is this belief which assigned virtues to the cardinal directions; East, South, West and North. It is in this tradition that a blessing is offered in support of this ceremony.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the East. Communication of the heart, mind, and body Fresh beginnings with the rising of each Sun. The knowledge of the growth found in the sharing of silences.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the South. Warmth of hearth and home The heat of the heart’s passion The light created by both To lighten the darkest of times.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the West. The deep commitments of the lake The swift excitement of the river The refreshing cleansing of the rain The all encompassing passion of the sea.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the North Firm foundation on which to build Fertility of the fields to enrich your lives A stable home to which you may always return.

Each of these blessings from the four cardinal directions emphasizes those things which will help you build a happy and successful union. Yet they are only tools. Tools which you must use together in order to create what you seek in this union.

I bid you look into each others eyes.

[Groom’s Name], Will you cause her pain?
I May
Is that your intent?
No

[Bride’s Name], Will you cause him pain?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

*To Both*
Will you share each other’s pain and seek to ease it?
Yes

And so the binding is made. Join your hands
*First cord is draped across the bride and grooms hands*

[Bride’s Name], Will you share his laughter?
Yes

[Groom’s Name], Will you share her laughter?
Yes

*To Both*
Will both of you look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other?
Yes

And so the binding is made.
*Second cord is draped across the couples hands*

[Bride’s Name], Will you burden him?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

[Groom’s Name], Will you burden her?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

*To Both*
Will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union?
Yes

And so the binding is made.
*Drape third cord across the couples, hands*

[Bride’s Name], will you share his dreams?
Yes

[Groom’s Name], will you share her dreams?
Yes

*To Both*
Will you dream together to create new realities and hopes?
Yes

And so the binding is made.
*Drape fourth cord across the couples hands*

[Groom’s Name], will you cause her anger?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

[Bride’s Name], will you cause him anger?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

*To Both*
Will you take the heat of anger and use it to temper the strength of this union?
We will.

And so the binding is made.
*Drape fifth cord across the couples hands*

[Bride’s Name], Will you honor him?
I will

[Groom’s Name], Will you honor her?
I will

*To Both*
Will you seek to never give cause to break that honor?
We shall never do so.

And so the binding is made.
*Drape sixth cord across the couples hands*

*Tie cords together while saying:*
The knots of this binding are not formed by these cords but instead by your vows. Either of you may drop the cords, for as always, you hold in your own hands the making of breaking of this union.

*Once cords are tied together they are removed and placed on altar*