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Creating Personal Traditions: Writing Your Own Wedding Vows

Writing your own wedding vows may suit your personal wedding style, but it can be a bit of a daunting task to begin with. If you are trying to write your own vows, don’t let the task overwhelm you or intimidate you. Writing your own vows should begin and end with how you feel, not what others are expecting. If you are creating your own wedding ceremony and style and you want to write your own vows, here are a few questions to consider in creating the vows you want to make.

• When and where did you first meet?
• What was the state of your life before the two of you met?
• At what point did you realize you were in love? Describe the feeling.
• What inspires you about your loved one?
• What life goals and dreams do you share?
• What have you learned from each other?
• What qualities make your love unique? What qualities will keep it strong?
• How has your view of the world changed since you fell in love?
• What do you most look forward to about life with this person?
• What are some special moments in your relationship? Use them all, even the sad times as well as the happy, moving, or profound.
• What happened the day you asked her to marry you? How did you feel?

Reading the vows you have written yourself during your wedding ceremony can be one of the most romantic things you’ve ever done. It’s the kind of thing that really helps you create your own personal wedding style. Writing your own vows is a kind of personal touch that cannot be replicated by any other style of vow.

Exchanging Rings and Vows

When a couple exchanges rings it is typical for them to do so with their ceremony wedding vows. Some couples want to write their own ceremony wedding vows and others want to find vows that reflect their thoughts. Ceremony wedding vows can be long and elaborate or short and sweet. They do not need to be one or the other. Here are a few sample ceremony wedding vows that may or may not be what you are looking for:

• This ring is a token of my love. I marry you with this ring and with all that I am.
• I give this ring as my gift to you. Wear it and think of me and know that I love you.
• I give you this ring in God’s name, as a symbol of all that we have shared and promised.
• This ring is a token of my love, my fidelity and of the unending circle of our lives for yesterday, today and tomorrow.
• I pledge to you all that I am and will ever be. With this ring, I am gladly yours and you are mine.
• This ring is a symbol of our love, our faith and our commitment to each other.
• Please take this ring as a token of my love, my trust and my unending desire to be with you for all the days of our lives.
• I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am and all that I have, I honor you, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit
• With this ring, I thee wed and I do bestow upon thee all the treasures of my heart, my mind and my hands.

Music is a Universal Language

Wedding ceremony music is about communicating in a language that everyone can understand. From the comforting tones of the wedding march to the salutations and hymns sung during ceremonies celebrating love, relationships and their commitment to a higher divinity, music serves multiple purposes.

The wedding ceremony music is important to the theme of the wedding and the location. During your wedding planning, always check with the ceremony location about their rules for music. While you will be choosing a song for your wedding reception, the song that you and your fiancé will dance your first dance to, you can also use recorded music during your ceremony.

Looking for a romantic song for your wedding? Want to make the ideal mix tape or burn the greatest romantic CD for your evening with spouse? Want a great song to request of the DJ so you can slow dance? Here are fifteen romantic song suggestions.

• Breathe - Faith Hill
• Can't Help Falling in Love With You - Elvis Presley
• Endless Love - Lionel Richie
• From This Moment On - Shania Twain and Bryan White
  
• Have I Told You Lately - Rod Stewart
• Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman - Bryan Adams
• I'll Be - Edwin McCain
• I Will Always Love You - Whitney Houston
• Something - The Beatles
• Take My Breath Away - Berlin
• You Are So Beautiful - Joe Cocker
• Unchained Melody - Righteous Brothers
• Unforgettable - Nat King Cole
• When I Fall in Love - Natalie Cole / Nat King Cole
• Woman - John Lennon
• The Way You Look Tonight - Frank Sinatra
• Love of My Life - Dave Matthews and Carlos Santana
  

An Intimate Wedding Ceremony

There is a lot to be said for an intimate wedding ceremony. Remember that the proposal was often done in quiet intimacy and will be filled with a gravitas that few other ceremonies related to marriage are going to accomplish. The wedding ceremony traditionally is about bringing the families together, but the truth is that some couples do not want to bring their families together for their wedding ceremony.

If you choose to go the route of the private wedding ceremony, you might consider this sample announcement to help calm the upset emotions from family or friends not invited to the actually ceremony.

Sample Announcement:

We invite you to take a moment on April 5th at 5:00 p.m. to say a prayer, a blessing or simply to observe a moment of silence as we, the bride and the groom, commit ourselves to one another and to walking the path of life together. In privacy and intimacy, we will make our commitment because our marriage is about joining our lives.

When you see us before, you will know us, as we were - individual and singular.

We invite you to join us at the Omni Hotel in the private dining room for a celebration dinner at 7 p.m. In lieu of any gifts, we ask that you instead make a donation to charity in our names as a couple that we will have become. We thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your love, your kindness and your devotion.

Exchanging Rings and Vows

When a couple exchanges rings it is typical for them to do so with their ceremony wedding vows. The wedding ceremony vows should be reflective of the feelings and commitment of the couple taking them.

Ceremony Music is Fundamental

Even in more traditional weddings, the wedding music can be altered to suit the couple’s tastes. For example, a band may play as the guests are arriving and participate in the bridal march. There may be hymns sung during the ceremony and another piece during the recessional.

Most often if a band is hired to do music during the wedding ceremony, they may very well roll over to play at the reception. The music is as important to the overall theme as the setting and ceremony type. Your choices may be limited by budgetary constraints. So it’s good to familiarize yourself with local bands especially when you are planning your wedding ceremony music.

If you have friends or family in a band, there’s a chance they may play the wedding for free or a nominal fee. Depending on the venue for the wedding, a choir might be available to perform during parts of the ceremony as the couple envisions it. It’s important to realize that your selections of music are very important to their overall enjoyment of the ceremony.

Creative Wedding Ideas

Instead of having the minister face the congregation, have him stand with his back to the congregation so your friends and family can see your faces. For a perfect creative wedding idea, have you and your beloved stand face-to-face throughout the ceremony instead.

Handfasting Vows

Know now before you go further, that since your lives have crossed in this life you have formed ties between each other. As you seek to enter this state of matrimony you should strive to make real, the ideals which give meaning to both this ceremony and the institution of marriage.

With full awareness, know that within this circle you are not only declaring your intent to be handfasted before your friends and family, but you speak that intent also to your creative higher powers.

The promises made today and the ties that are bound here greatly strengthen your union; they will cross the years and lives of each soul´s growth.

Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?

Yes, we seek to enter.

In times past it was believed that the human soul shared characteristics with all things divine. It is this belief which assigned virtues to the cardinal directions; East, South, West and North. It is in this tradition that a blessing is offered in support of this ceremony.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the East. Communication of the heart, mind, and body Fresh beginnings with the rising of each Sun. The knowledge of the growth found in the sharing of silences.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the South. Warmth of hearth and home The heat of the heart´s passion The light created by both To lighten the darkest of times.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the West. The deep commitments of the lake The swift excitement of the river The refreshing cleansing of the rain The all encompassing passion of the sea.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the North Firm foundation on which to build Fertility of the fields to enrich your lives A stable home to which you may always return.

Each of these blessings from the four cardinal directions emphasizes those things which will help you build a happy and successful union. Yet they are only tools. Tools which you must use together in order to create what you seek in this union.

I bid you look into each others eyes.

[Groom´s Name], Will you cause her pain?
I May
Is that your intent?
No

[Bride´s Name], Will you cause him pain?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

*To Both*
Will you share each other´s pain and seek to ease it?
Yes


And so the binding is made. Join your hands
*First cord is draped across the bride and grooms hands*

[Bride´s Name], Will you share his laughter?
Yes


[Groom´s Name], Will you share her laughter?
Yes


*To Both*
Will both of you look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other?
Yes


And so the binding is made.
*Second cord is draped across the couples hands*

[Bride´s Name], Will you burden him?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

[Groom´s Name], Will you burden her?
I may
Is that your intent?
No


*To Both*
Will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union?
Yes


And so the binding is made.
*Drape third cord across the couples, hands*

[Bride´s Name], will you share his dreams?
Yes


[Groom´s Name], will you share her dreams?
Yes


*To Both*
Will you dream together to create new realities and hopes?
Yes

And so the binding is made.
*Drape fourth cord across the couples hands*

[Groom´s Name], will you cause her anger?
I may
Is that your intent?
No


[Bride´s Name], will you cause him anger?
I may
Is that your intent?
No


*To Both*
Will you take the heat of anger and use it to temper the strength of this union?
We will.


And so the binding is made.
*Drape fifth cord across the couples hands*

[Bride´s Name], Will you honor him?
I will


[Groom´s Name], Will you honor her?
I will


*To Both*
Will you seek to never give cause to break that honor?
We shall never do so.


And so the binding is made.
*Drape sixth cord across the couples hands*

*Tie cords together while saying:*
The knots of this binding are not formed by these cords but instead by your vows. Either of you may drop the cords, for as always, you hold in your own hands the making of breaking of this union.

*Once cords are tied together they are removed and placed on altar*

The Wedding Mass

The Catholic wedding ceremony is remarkable in that it can be celebrated with or without a mass. The majority of practicing Catholics are going to choose a wedding ceremony with the Mass. A Catholic wedding ceremony with a mass lasts about one hour. The Mass portion includes a celebration of the Eucharist, the singing of hymns and readings from the Bible.

Upon entering the church, Catholics will bless themselves by dipping their fingers into the font and making the Sign of the Cross. A non-Catholic attending is not required to perform the gesture. Ushers may seat guests and before taking their seat in the pew, a Catholic should make the Sign of the Cross and bend down on one knee. Once all have arrived in the Church and the ceremony begins, the Priest will greet the bride, groom and guests. He will open with prayer and the guests as well as the bridal couple will alternate standing and bowing at appropriate times.

The homily of a Catholic wedding ceremony should focus on marriage and if the couple is well known to the priest, he may offer his own personal observations and relations to them in the homily. The vows will be taken after the homily and the Prayer of the Faithful follows. The Catholic wedding ceremony is a beautiful symbiosis of uniting the marriage with the mass. This is the beauty of celebrating religion, faith and love in one ceremony.

Before communion is served, the priest will ask for there to be a Sign of Peace. When he calls for this, he means for people to turn to hose that are next to them and shake their hands and offer peace be with them. Family and loved ones will often kiss and hug as well during this part. When the Communion is offered during a Catholic wedding ceremony, it’s important to remember that it is for baptized Catholics only. Following communion, the priest will introduce the new couple to the guests.

Program Maps

Even if you put maps in the invitations, it´s a good idea also to put a map to the reception in the ceremony program. People sometimes forget them!

Hand Fasting

Are you considering a traditional or alternative wedding ceremony? Have you ever heard of hand fasting? It has seen a revival in the last few decades from the fringe to the mainstream. A hand fasting indicated a betrothal and marriage in medieval times. There are many who interpret a hand fasting as a trial marriage, latching onto the idea that it lasts a year and a day. This concept dates back to a time when divorce was not an option for many couples and fertility was important to the success of a marriage.

As an alternative wedding ceremony, a couple chooses hand fasting because it is a part of their faith and belief to make their commitment to marriage. They are typically surrounded in a circle by the attendees while the minister or priest joins their hands by symbolically tying them together. It honors the trinity of man, woman and the divine and promises the trinity of what will hopefully be man, woman and child.

In this, it is an honest commitment to marriage and not a substitute for it. The venue for the hand fasting can be a living room, a garden or a waterfall - anywhere the couple has chosen. It can be held in the morning, when the first rays of the sun are coming above the horizon - the time honors the start of a new life beginning with the start of a new day.

A hand fasting is a recognized alternative wedding ceremony and still requires a licensed justice of the peace, minister or other legally recognized individual must perform the ceremony unless the couple registers their marriage at a courthouse beforehand.

Wedding Ceremony Vows - Cherokee Vows

Try these Cherokee wedding ceremony vows:
God in heaven above please protect the ones we love.
We honour all you created as we pledge our hearts and lives together. We honour mother-earth - and ask for our marriage to be abundant and grow stronger through the seasons;
We honour fire - and ask that our union be warm and glowing with love in our hearts; We honour wind - and ask we sail though life safe and calm as in our father´s arms; We honour water - to clean and soothe our relationship - that it may never thirsts for love; With all the forces of the universe you created, we pray for harmony and true happiness as we forever grow
young together. Amen."

DIY Bridal Bouquet

When making your own bridal bouquet, it's best to make it the morning of the wedding so that it appears as fresh as you are!
If, for some reason, you are unable to make the bridal bouquet the morning of the wedding (and let's face it, many brides have other things to do), then your best option is to use silk flowers. Silk flowers have come a long way and many brides are now opting to go with silk flowers as both a way to cut costs and preserve the bridal bouquet for a lifetime. Of course, the added bonus is that you can make your bridal bouquet long before the wedding day arrives.
Silk flowers can be bought wholesale through online retailers.

Wedding Ceremony Traditional Vows

If you´re looking for well-written wedding ceremony traditional vows, you might try this one from William Shakespeare:
Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments, Love is no Love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove
Oh no! It is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wand´ring bark,
Whose worth´s unknown, although his height be taken,
Love´s not time´s fool, though rosy lips and cheers
Within his bending sickle´s compass come;
Love alters not with its brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

One Usher, Two Ushers, Three Ushers, Four . .

If you´d like to have ushers to seat guests at your wedding, the general formula is one usher for every fifty guests. So if you´re inviting 100 people, you´d have two ushers; for 200 people you´d need four.